I am No-more here

Hey friends thanks a lot for your comments and advises. I have exported my blog to my another blog id. Follow me on http://tryingmyhandatpoetry.blogspot.com/ if you want to read my regular posts. :)
Would love to see you there. :D
Regards
Saumya

I LOVE YOU DADDY

I don't know how long it has been.
Since I have stopped being keen.
Waiting for Sunday to come again
which was the only way to ease my pain

Being away from you
Is something I am used to do
But now when I am with you
I realize how much I miss you

For me when everything is blue
You are someone I can always turn to
Thanks for not just being there
But also making some difference

Though physical presence is not a part
of love; I always know you are right here
Deep within my heart
Right here, so clear.

I am a strong girl
But you are the one who gave me strength
Sometime it gets dull
As every passing moment increases the length

You hear me when I am sad
You bear me when I am bad
You correct me whenever I am wrong
You support me when I start loosing myself all along

Spending these few days with you after a hiatus
I realize all your sacrifices are because your love for us is impetus
God knows what I did in my previous birth
That in form of you- My father, he rewarded me on this earth.

Learning from your life, sacrifices and sufferings.
I realize nothing on this earth is impossible.
With your lessons and blessings
Now for me everything is possible

And for you
I just want to set you free from the worries; for me you do
I want to promise you
To never belittle your expectations or desires
To explore, seek and experience my world.
To feel empowered.
To achieve more and repent less.
To ride strong and ride high on whichever journey I undertake.
I promise to live our dreams.

You have given me the serenity
To accept the things I can't change.
You have given me the courage
To change the things I can
And you have given me the wisdom
to know the difference.

You are my best friend.
I know you will be there till the end.
You are my inspiration
I say that for your every creation.
You are my God-father
I desire in every life to be your daughter.

I love you with all my heart
I miss you while being apart

...FOR YOU I WILL...

Please honey,
Don't you worry !
With you I am always here,
Throw away all your fears !

I will dry the tears from your face.
And put happiness in its place.
If you will be alone, I will be your shadow !
If you want a hug, I will be your pillow !

If you want to cry, I will flow from your grace !
If you want to be happy, I will glow on your face !
My precious precious friend, I love you !
And I will never ever leave you !

If I be there for ever,
you would be too !
Together forever-
just me and you !

And soon will come a day,
When you will say,
With you my friend
All my sorrows started to end !

P.S. It may not be a literary brilliance, but its completely heart felt and through this poem I assure you my friend, through any obstacles or challenges, we will face them together.
P.S. I am sorry if there is any mistake in my writing because I am crying right now, I don't know what I am writing.

MY MOTHER-MY HERO

She is my angel,
Or rather an archangel.
She is my hero,
All others in front of her are absolute zero.
But above all, she is my mother,
Whom I can compare with no other.

No matter, what she gets from me,
She has always one thing to give.
And that is her unconditional love.
My life is at her disposal,
Or else I am dead.

For any fault of mine,
She may scold.
But for my one simple smile,
She will let her universe to be sold.
When I am ill she stays awake whole night,
She prays to the lord to give me strength to fight.

No-one can ever harm me,
When she is with me, all others just flee.
I don't remember how many times I have told her,
That I love her more than she knows.
But action speaks louder than words,
Thus she never shows.

And her unconditional care,
Means so much to me that it makes me feel that life is a celebration.
Of love told in silent whispers.
And in this silence the truth resonates,

That I love her forever the most.

BEING INDIFFERENT IS NOT EASY

It was neither good,
Nor it was bad.
I was not on the groove,
I was not even sad.

The way he touched!
The way he moved!
The way he clutched!
The way he stood!

Didn't make any difference.
Lying there like a doll,
I was just showing my indifference,
in ever way he wanted to crawl.

I don't have any obsessiveness,
Nor do I have any possessiveness.
If he is not or if he is mine,
either way with me its fine.

Its not just about him,
With everything related to me.
It hardly matters
What around me gathers.

I tried to behave like a prude.
Learning to say "no",
I learned to be rude.
And always I let it go.

Did I not react,
Because I love him?
Or is it the fact,
That I am ready to leave him.

The reason yet to be explored.
Searching it I often get bored.
Again getting apathetic.
And to myself I am never sympathetic.

Why is it growing so fast,
In my life will it ever last?
With this lifestyle I need a break,
Because everything in my eyes are fake.

Is something missing,
Or I am just satisfied?
Why am I reminiscing,
The moments I got criticized.

Its hard to live,
but its harder to die
I have nothing to give
except my cry.

With no purpose in life,
I am going on living it.
I hardly remember what turns me on,
And what turns me off.

I don't feel alone,
Nor I feel affectionately loved.
To this feeling I am always prone,
As if I am imprisoned.

If I don't understand myself,
How can I expect any other one to.
If I don't love myself,
How can I wish some one else will do.

It is the passion,
That is missing.
There is no compassion,
That's what is pissing.

My smile is lost.
My eyes are stained with tears.
I am ready to get my life back at any cost.
If I could ever overcome my fears.

Though I don't know what are my fears.
And for what reason my eyes are flooding me with tears.
Life is like a bird, you hold it tightly, it dies.
You hold it lightly it flies.
And as for myself I don't know if it died,
Or it flew aside.

Life sometimes becomes so selfish that it wants everything
And while trying for everything we miss something.
That is worth every thing.
I guess I missed something as well as everything.
While trying for nothing.

I don't want to hurt myself.
I don't want to love myself.
I don't want to caress myself
I don't want to hate myself.

Perfection is just an illusion,
From which I am suffering.
The only solution is seclusion
And I can get rid of this occurring.

I don't know,
Whats wrong with me?
What I am now,
And what I used to be!

Have to live as long as god wants me to.
Just waiting to die.
Will suffer every punishment, feeling blue.
And soon I will say good bye.

P.S. I have written this poem because the girl characterized in the poem was wandering around my mind ever since I can remember. I read a story somewhere (I don't remember), where this girl faced a lot of problems, problems of every kind and which are out of even our imagination. She went on living being indifferent, very rarely she cried but every time, she cried, her cry was just showing that she is pretending to be indifferent but being indifferent about anything in real life is just near to impossible. And it hurts a lot sub-consciously. Her story and her condition appealed me to the bottom of my heart. I don't know If I am able to put her feelings in a good way but whatever it just touched my heart. I don't know the solution about her problems or anything else I just know one thing that I have developed a soft corner for her thought it does not make any difference to her.
P.S. She brought the longest poem out of me, I have ever written. Thanks to you girl.

गरीबी

गरीबी
गरीबी जीवन का अभिशाप,
न जाने किस ज़न्म का पाप ।
ठण्ड से ठिठुरते गात,
काटते हैं खुले आसमान के नीचे रात।

कैसे मिटे उनकी भूख और प्यास,
हैं वे हर तरफ़ से निराश।
कोई करे उनके लिए प्रयास,
ताकि पूरी हो जाए उनकी आस ।

राजनीति

राजनीति
आज की राजनीति
रोक रही हमारी प्रगति।
हो गए है अंग्रेजों से आजाद
पर नेताओं के झूठे नारे कर रहे हमें बरबाद।

बंद करो अपने झूठे नारे
वादों के है खोखले सारे।
अच्छी होगी यदि राजनीति
देश करेगा तभी प्रगती ।